The second article, "Five Money Woes That Can Trouble a Marriage," is more about the unexpected things that can get you down. When a couple is facing the next 40+ years of their lives together, it's impossible to predict everything and pre-determine your answers to things. After all, many of the things that financially devastate us are also emotionally wrenching, and we can't say with certainty how we'd react in the future.I think this one is more about finding out your responses to crises, and your approach to catastrophe, and a reminder to deal with things as a couple, as a team; and of course, everyone should have a nest egg.
Continuing this theme was last Thursday's front page feature, the story of the Bachmuth family, whose young daughter is literally pulling her hair out from the stress Mr. Bachmuth's job loss has imposed on his whole family. Particularly interesting were the issues of traditional family/gender/breadwinner roles, and how a shift in those roles can be devastating (or not).
Many of the comments following the article are judgmental (okay, the couple's argument about firing the cleaning lady does sound a little out of touch), but the audio slide show puts things into perspective. From the pictures & audio, I saw a couple struggling with something they never thought would happen to them, and they are handling it the best they know how.
Do I think I'd react differently to that financial situation? Absolutely; I see a lot of issues here that seem bigger than the current economic crisis. But I can't judge. Who knows what marriage will bring? All we can do is promise to work through it -- together.
*Image of the Bachmuth family by Michael Stravato for the New York Times.
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