Photographers, Seeking Same Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Knowing that I was looking at photographers in a different way than most brides, I decided to quit looking at endless websites & photographers' blogs and just think about what I wanted from this particular vendor. And who better to listen to than someone who's already faced this dilemma?

Wedding photographers! And this week, I've been listening more closely than ever. As I continue with this drama (not much happening at the moment, just in between meetings & phone calls, and evaluating portfolios), here's what's been ringing in my head:

"I don't believe [that] every photographer (or any photographer) is the best at everything. I think that certain people are the best at specific things, and Jose [Villa] is the best at the particular kind of wedding that Jeff and I are going to be having." - Jessica Claire

Hmm. What kind of wedding are we having? Better answer this one, quick.

"My priorities for a wedding photographer were [...] that I be able to look at the wedding photos and know undoubtedly that he/she did the best job with our day that could be done..." - Jessica Claire

No pressure, right??

"On my wedding day itself, I want the day to just unfold organically and I want to remember the story and all of the little stories that make up the big story. I want to see moments in my pictures that maybe I wasn’t even present for and I want to be able to relive the way the day felt. So, knowing this I knew that I wanted to go with someone who is a photojournalist…someone who can tell a story with an image…someone who can create images that say more than what is at first obvious to the viewer. Images that make you want to look a little deeper and stare a little longer." - Justine Ungaro

This one I'd already considered... one of my long-standing marks of a good photographer is that his/her images make me cry, even when I don't know the people in them.

I needed to do some soul-searching, think long & hard about how I want our wedding to be remembered, and fast.

*Photo of Justine Ungaro on her wedding day by Greg Gibson

First Bout of Wedding Anguish Monday, September 28, 2009

Hey, what's a blog without a little drama, right? Well, for the past week, I've had plenty of internal drama.

So I'm a photographer, and I've been informally studying photography for years. For the past two, I've been seriously into wedding photography. If there's a top name out there, I know it.

But since I can't afford those top names, I started looking for a local & affordable photographer the minute I got engaged. After seven months, I found one. I met him, he was nice, and I booked him.

Sure, there were some shots that needed better lighting. Sure, I would need to process some of the shots. And maybe some of them should have been in black & white. But it's okay. He's been in lots of magazines. He's world class. He gets good reviews! And besides, I don't need any of those high-class photographers. What would they do with someone like me, anyway?

This conversation went on in my head for weeks. The truth is, for some strange reason, I was totally intimidated by the idea of hiring one of the best. They kind of scared me. And I was somehow unable to fully admit how incredibly important photography is to me. I just didn't want to face up to it -- the wedding is one event, over in one day, and every decision counts. Especially this one.

Once the original photog cashed my check, it really hit the fan. I started seeing his blog posts, and the photography has actually gotten worse. Technical issues galore, allowing strange people to second-shoot... it was awful. Finally, after one weekend looking at wedding photog's sites and thinking, "Wow, I'll never get a shot like that from _____," it was time to make a choice.

And I've decided to fire my photographer. I feel awful... we'll be walking away from our 25% deposit (and I hope we don't owe anymore), and I feel terrible that my lack of self-esteem and poor judgment led to such a money- and time-wasting decision. But at least it's not at the expense of my wedding photos.

I also want to add that this guy is a wonderful photographer, for many happy clients a year. But just not me. I've realized that I want a style of photography that he just doesn't offer, and my technical picky-ness isn't a reflection of his talent. But in order for me to be happy, I have to move in a different direction.

Making that decision gave me the most peace I've felt in weeks.

And now we start again...!

The dress: Which fabric? Friday, September 18, 2009

Now that I've chosen my dress, I need to figure out what fabric to use. As mentioned, I'm partial to silk dupioni, but I'm not sure if it needs something heavier. While studying fabrics, I found it absolutely fascinating to see how silk is made. I remember a couple years ago watching a documentary about it, and I found this cool how-to with pictures and explanations.

I also found this *wonderful* glossary from, of all places, J. Crew.

Our cotton cady comes from a premier Japanese mill. This fabric has a compact weave and a crisp cotton hand, making it ideal for structured silhouettes that fit the body perfectly without drape. Our designers love the juxtaposition of simple cotton with a very elegant shimmer.

Cotton organdy: an ethereal, semi-sheer fabric with a stiff, crisp finish that seems to float on air. Ours is covered with gently swaying, embroidered flowers and comes from the same Japanese house that makes our very best eyelet laces.

Our signature cotton, also known as Liberty Tana lawn (named after Lake Tana in Sudan where the cotton was originally grown), comes from Liberty Art Fabric—legendary for their distinctive textiles and prints. It's a soft, lightweight, woven cotton, combed with a crisp finish and boasting a graceful drape.

Pronounced "tool" and well-known as the stuff ballerina tutus and wedding veils are made of, we use it as a crinoline in our Whitney dress to give the skirt a dramatic silhouette. The word "tulle" comes from the French city of that name, but it applies to hexagonal mesh fabric no matter where it's made.

A very refined, utterly elegant fabric with a cool, dry hand. We searched far and wide for an airy, angelic fabric like this and finally found it at an Italian mill with a sterling reputation for fine linens.

This softly rippled fabric is silk-cotton cloqué with a "hammered" finish and a full-bodied drape. It's specially treated during the weaving process for a slightly crisp handfeel and a very festive rustle.

Also known as crepe-backed satin, it's a designer's dream because either side of this splendid fabric can be used as the face. The contrast of matte crepe and shiny satin in the same design, coupled with a luxurious drape, is simply spectacular.

Crinkle silk chiffon lends an ethereal quality to party dresses and gowns. Its whisper-light beauty and subtle texture adds a touch of dimension to basic chiffon. It drapes beautifully, and takes dyes and prints particularly well.

The marriage of smooth silk and crisp cotton creates a lightweight, diaphanous fabric with a subtle shine and a soft handfeel. We think it's just perfect for a wedding dress.

Dupioni is a lustrous silk characterized by a quiet sheen and nubby texture. Woven in India, dupioni takes dye beautifully and thus, is often shown in a wide range of rich colors. Its crisp hand makes it a popular choice for dresses as it lends subtle structure and elegant drape.

A four-ply, crisp organza with a tight weave. We get ours from a very famous Italian mill. It's a heavier fabric with an even texture and a luxurious matte finish.

A heavier, elaborately woven fabric that combines several textures into one material. It's a subtle way to wear a pattern, making it a perfectly unexpected option for a wedding gown.

The ultimate in elegance with a luxurious feel and a brilliantly lustrous shimmer. This rich, substantial fabric has a crisp, firm texture with raised cords, making it ideal for structured silhouettes that exude sophistication and drama.

An ultra-luxurious, very special fabric usually reserved for royal weddings and haute couture. This midweight Italian silk is so rare that we have only a few limited gowns available.

Lightweight and lustrous, it's woven the same way the Persians made silk taftah five-hundred years ago: with very fine, almost invisible ribs that make a festive rustle whenever you move.

Silk tricotine is a triple-ply matte fabric with a twilled weave and a slight sheen. Cut on the bias, it has a heavy drape with a beautiful, flowing movement. It's substantial enough to shape itself to the body without cling.

The smoothest silk with a touch of wool, lending a very sumptuous hand to the fabric. Silk wool is known for taking color beautifully and imparting a rich, deep lustre.

Slub silk was historically used for "high court" gowns because of its luxurious handfeel. The subtle, uneven texture of the fabric is due to the weaving of double strands of silk. We love the rich look and feel of it for our special occasion dresses.

Wedding Wednesday: Engagement Shoot Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Here's a great engagement shoot I found via So You're EnGAYged, which celebrates its 6 month anniversary this week. All week they're featuring beautifully photographed weddings and all kinds of ideas & inspiration. This shoot comes to us from Nasilele Photography and features a very nice photojournalistic look.

I, of course, am a sucker for a sweet shot with a camera!


And all things pink.


Congratulations to these two who are so handsome and lucky in love! Photographed by Nasilele Photography (click for full post).

Choosing a DJ Thursday, September 10, 2009

Since a few of my major vendors are already booked, I thought I'd post something about the selection process.

I am super excited to work with our DJ. I thought (for about 5 minutes) of having an iPod reception (remember, I was in "garden wedding" mode), but I gave up on that idea fast. There are just too many variables, and asking a friend to DJ our wedding instead of being an actual guest seemed kind of sad, and we didn't have anyone we thought would volunteer. That said, I think an ipod wedding can work very well if you're creative & have the resources (sound system, a consistently working laptop, etc.). Because we are into international music and mixed genres, I didn't even consider a live band, although I do plan to have live music for the ceremony & cocktail hour.

So I knew I wanted a DJ. I know that FH and I are *major* music fiends, and we needed someone with the expertise and interests to be able to play several different genres and get the crowd to relate to them all. I also wanted someone who could keep the party moving. Our party would be quite a challenge; we'll have people of all ages, from 2- and 6- year olds up to people in their 80s, and we want them all to have a great time.

Other than that I had no idea where to start with this, no idea about price points or anything except what theknot.com calculator said a DJ should cost. I started emailing at random. I started by looking at the vendors in the one place I'm familiar: other photographers' blogs. Seriously! I already subscribe to a million photography blogs, several of them local, and it's a great resource. If the people were having a great time in the photos, I paid extra special attention to who the DJ was.

I sent out brief emails saying we were looking for a DJ with experience with multicultural crowds and an interest in different genres of music.

One person wrote back and said I was "weird." Another didn't respond.

Then, I found one more DJ on WeddingWire. He just had a nice look about him, and his website was pretty good. I emailed him and not only could he accommodate us, but he seemed excited about it! On speaking to him, he was just as congenial and knowledgeable as his emails suggested. I liked him so much that I figured his price was high -- and it was. A quick search, however, revealed that what I thought was "high" was "average for this area."

It was four months before I called him back to book him for our wedding. In the meantime, I discovered that he was DJ for a wedding of one of my coworkers, who had a beautiful wedding about a year ago. I felt comfortable with him, and it was a no-brainer.

We'll see how it goes next summer, but I have a pretty good feeling about it. We'll be meeting in December to talk about details, song lists, and schedules. I'll be compiling my song list in the meantime!

Let Them Eat Some Other Kind of Cake Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Despite our wedding being almost a year away, there are some things we've already decided. For some reason, neither of us can get excited about wedding cake. We always laugh when that cake show commercial comes on and the baker says, "The cake is the center of the wedding!" Really? Cake?! The center? Of the WEDDING? And then we dissolve into giggles.

I don't know why; I've been to plenty of weddings and had some pretty good cake. But I just can't justify paying $600-$1,000 (or more!) for what might just turn out to be expertly decorated waxy sugar. Although I definitely appreciate the artistry of those cake bakers & decorators; I know it's hard work!

So far, we've come up with the idea of having a cake display table. I'd love to have some cakes from our favorite local stores (Whole Foods makes an amazing plain round cake), accompanied by some photos on display and, Mr. PinkBroom's idea, to have some interesting or humorous cake toppers. I believe my mother saved her cake topper from her marriage to my dad nearly 40 (!) years ago; maybe we could put that among them.

I love this cake table from Jill & Mike's wedding:



For the record, I can't stand those cake toppers showing the bride dragging the groom away somewhere, those are awful. But maybe we could find a way to display a bunch of little humorous cake toppers, like this one currently making the rounds:



Ha!

Anyone else out there doing something alternative for your wedding cake?